Tired.

When am I going to be free? I have this love-hate relationship with school which makes it hard to be consistent with the things that I do. Its so frustrating having no breaks whatsoever and the demands never end. At least with semester and public colleges, you get to enjoy a three day weekend or break here and there...I only get the privilege of having ONE day off! It definitely drags on and I hate being here 10 weeks straight for 3 terms and end up leaving school in June. I thought college was supposed to end in May? Boy was I wrong, its like high school all over again minus the easy work, minus the holidays, and minus the commute. Anyway, so, here I am AGAIN trying to read and write this paper for today in about 7-8 hours and its not hard stuff, I just don't feel inspired to do it. I have come to realize that I have a hard time learning and being happy when I am confined to structure and deadlines. I just don't do well with those two things, but honestly, what can you do. I have also realized, in life, everything is deadlines and structure, unless youre an artist.

Which brings me to writing about art. When I was younger I used to LOVE to draw, color, paint, the whole nine. In high school I loved my art class and was probably the only one who took is seriously and even picked up learning how to play the guitar. I love the way it makes me feel and it sucks now because I haven't done either in SOOOO LONG! Its probably been 3 or 4 years since I have really done either. I am trying to get back into things and I started by applying to take a art class, hopefully I get in! That will be my escape for spring term and its craziness. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE SPRING TERM but sheesh, it can get overwhelming with all the partying and heat and definitely not focusing on school work. Hopefully art will bring me back to peace and help me focus with work.

Thats another thing, I have such a HARD time focusing on school work but I do know that with playing the guitar and drawing, no one can disturb me and I don't stop until I am done and its perfect. Art is a beautiful thing, whether you like to draw, sing, play an intrument, whatever, it is beautiful. I wish I could sing, because thats probably one instrument I will never be able to play well. Oh well, you can't be blessed with everything :)

Now, back to writing about Slavery in the 18th Century!!!