Trying my hardest to really get started on my papers, but I am just NOT focused. And people wonder why I do my shit last minute because when I do try to get things done early my head is just not HERE! This is what frustrates me most about school. You know what you have to do but you just can't get it done in a stress-free way, I always end up stressed as fuck but in the end it does get done.
As I attempt to write about the role of racism in the exploitation of people of African descent I am bombarded with questions of what the future holds. Although I still have a year- two years left of college (depending on if I want to stay an extra year), it feels like these three years have passed by so fast and I hate the feeling of growing up. I always wanted to be older and start my life as an independent woman with a career and possibly a family in the future future, but now it just seems too fast! When I was younger, I planned on graduating, having a career, and getting married by the age of 26...being 21 now, all of those things seems impossible, and honestly, I don't think I want any of that. I have yet to live my life, I don't want to start working and I definitely do not want to elope ANYTIME soon. All I want to do right now is be carefree and travel and experience new things. Growing through life experiences is way more important to me than actually making a lot of money or even graduating. The more I look into it, and the more I learn about myself, I see how much more I learn about myself and the world by traveling. Even though I haven't been many places, I have seen a lot of Turkey (the good and bad) and I have been to Mali, Africa, which I think was one of the MOST amazing experiences of my life. It is something I will NEVER forget because I not only learned about the people and culture but I learned about myself and most importantly, I learned, being happy is what I should strive for, above everything else.
The picture above describes what I felt about my trip and the true essence of the Malian culture and its people. Despite having nothing in the eyes of Americans and most economically stable countries, these people had way more than anyone else in the world. Their love for life is what kept them going and yeah they really did not know if they were going to put food on the table tomorrow, the fact that they were alive at that moment and full at that moment mattered to them. I definitely want to go back again and see the progression of the village that I helped build a school for. I would love to see the people that I saw exactly four years ago.
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